UPDATE: I didn't get the time entirely wrong, but apparently the Fox "News" interview with Sith Lord Cheney will be taped at 2 p.m. and aired at 6 p.m. Sweet. Now I get to watch Cheney's Pack of Lies during dinner. Thanks to fellow BARBARian Blognonymous for the info.
Dammit, I wish I was working from home today, because Vice President Cheney will so graciously let us know his take on the whole Whittington peppering/shooting/pop-cappin' accident today at 2 p.m. (that's 1900 GMT, y'all). I'm expecting oodles of snarling and dismissive chatter, and lots and lots of "I did nothing wrong" proclamations.
Or maybe Cheney will tell us that, in fact, he shot a man, just to show us he could.
Jesus' General, in his ever-so brilliant deduction, has come up with a "Magic BB" theory. According to his interpretation of the police report, there's no way a tiny BB, weighing 1/345th of an ounce, could have made its way through Whittington's jacket, skin, muscle, bone, and eventually, his heart, from 30 yards away unless ... you know ... it was magic.
It doesn't take an expertise in forensics to know that something's not right here.
Mama loves her some Jesus' General. Go check out the rest of the post. It's quite funny and disturbing at the same time.