I mean, she's pretty I guess, but ...

... gorgeous?

NEW YORK (CNN) -- Pakistan's new president called GOP vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin "gorgeous" when the two met in New York on Wednesday.

Palin has been in New York meeting international leaders in town this week for United Nations meetings.

On entering a room filled with several Pakistani officials Wednesday, Palin was immediately greeted by Sherry Rehman, the country's information minister.

"And how does one keep looking that good when one is that busy?" Rehman asked Palin, drawing friendly laughter from the room.

"Oh, thank you," Palin said.

Pakistan's new president, Asif Ali Zardari, entered the room seconds later. Palin rose to shake his hand, saying she was "honored" to meet him.

Zardari then called her "gorgeous" and said: "Now I know why the whole of America is crazy about you."

"You are so nice," Palin said, smiling. "Thank you."

I don't know what offends me more---the sexism, or the fact that Palin is getting her international playa game on while, oh by the way, I'm still single. Also, the crack about how the "whole of America" is crazy about this woman. Fuck that shit.

Somewhere out there, McCain's campaign staffers are falling all over themselves, trying to figure out how they can spin this, to somehow use it as proof that Palin somehow has sufficient foreign policy experience. Or whatever. Because she gave the Pakistani president a boner.


Photo credit: Getty Images via CNN.com

Love your hoohaa, please. That's all I ask.

You all know by now the "scandal" that erupted in Atlantic Beach, Fla. with the woman who was so offended that the marquee advertising The Vagina Monologues actually said the word "vagina" on it.

Atlantic Theatres in Atlantic Beach, Florida, received a complaint from a woman who'd seen the advertised title as she drove past with her niece. She said that it had made her niece ask her what a vagina was.

The theatre's Bryce Pfanenstiel commented: 'I'm on the phone and asked “What did you tell her?” She's like, “I'm offended I had to answer the question.”'

Hello, you're a woman. You have one. Your niece? She has one. Why be offended that you had to answer the question? What you succeeded in doing is throwing the blanket of shame around it. And thanks for passing that shame along to your niece, when all you could have said was,

"Oh that? That word is 'vagina,' and it's what you call the body part between your legs."

Or something to that effect. And boom. End of discussion.

But instead, because of your stupid, freaked-out, Puritanical, shame-throwing, vagina-hating ways, you pretty much forced the owners of the theatre to change 'vagina' to "hoo haa," as in "The Hoohaa Chronicles." Corny. So not only have you made your niece feel dirty because she has a vagina, but you've also done your part to censor art. Congratulations, you stupid ass.

Props to the theatre owners for changing the marquee back to the play's original title. I personally don't think you should have even changed it in the first place, but it's cool. You're redeemed.

To the woman in this story: Obviously you haven't seen the vagina celebration that is The Vagina Monologues. I suggest you buy yourself a ticket. STAT.

Say it loud and proud, girlfriend: I HAVE A VAGINA.

UPDATE: On second thought, maybe this woman is one of those who think her vag is ugly.


(Props to Scott for the link.)

Sexpresso

It's hard enough keeping our sisters off the pole, but now, this?

In Tukwila, Wash., the baristas at Cowgirls Espresso offer a bit of T&A with your morning latte. And it's not only Cowgirls Espresso, either. In an ever-growing caffeinated marketplace, Washington cafes struggle to differentiate themselves by resorting to the prurient interests of their customer base.

Check out this snippet from Penthouse Forum The Seattle Times:

In a short, sheer, baby-doll negligee and coordinated pink panties, Candice Law is dressed to work at a drive-through espresso stand in Tukwila, and she is working it.

Customers pull their trucks up to the window, where Law greets each with an affectionate nickname, blows kisses, and vamps about as she steams milk for a mocha. "You want whipped cream?" she asks, a sly smile playing on her pierced lip.

The next customer rolls up, and Law throws a long leg onto the window sill, like an indie-rock ballerina at the barre.

"Do you like my leg warmers?" she asks. "Aren't they hot?"

Hot is not the half of it. To stand apart from the hordes of drive-through espresso stands that clutter the Northwest's roadsides, commuter coffee stops such as Tukwila's Cowgirls Espresso are adding bodacious baristas, flirty service and ever more-revealing outfits to the menu.

At Port Orchard's Natté Latté, baristas sport hot-pink hot pants and tight white tank tops. Day-of-the-week theme outfits ranging from racy lingerie to "fetish" ensembles are the dress code at Moka Girls Espresso in Auburn and at several Cowgirls Espresso stands in the area. Bikini tops are the special at Café Lorraine on Highway 9 in Woodinville, and the women of The Sweet Spot in Shoreline pose provocatively in Playmate-style profiles on the stand's Web site.

"In this area, we all know how to make good coffee," said Barbara Record, who opened Bikini Espresso in Renton last month. The trick is to set your business apart, she said, and sex is one sure-fire way to do that.

"It's just, how far do you want to go?" she said.

Barista Candice Law at Cowgirls Espresso in Tukwila says she makes more in tips than she ever did as a waitress at Hooters. (OF COURSE you do! ---me)

I'm no prude, and I'm all for women owning their sexuality, but I can't help but think that this whole thing is just about objectifying women via caffeination. There are so many issues running amok here; the patriarchy (these cafe owners are mostly men), market-supported lecherousness ("there will be no "thong Thursday," as some customers have requested") and homophobia ("If I'm going to pay $4 for a cup of coffee" said one male customer, "I'm not going to get served by a guy") that this whole thing leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

I mean, why not just consolidate your efforts and serve espresso at the freakin' strip club?

UPDATE 1/30/07: I was hoping Twisty would offer up commentary on this, and she did. Go read.

UPDATE 2/5/07: Just a thought: As a former barista, I just hope these gals wear aprons. OSHA. Just sayin'.

Oh, and P.S., I didn't think I'd get as many blog hits for this post as I've been getting lately. (Big up to Cowgirls Espresso Barista Candice Law for linking to me on her MySpace page, among other folks on the Internets.) Just to clarify my position on this, I don't look down upon the baristas working at these kinds of coffee shops, for it's their choice to do so. I just disagree in general with the premise of using sex to sell a cup of coffee. I've dealt with many a silly customer during many opening shifts past; it was bad enough being stuck at a job that pays a little better than minimum wage; the last thing I want is some horndog early riser schmuck leering at my jubbiles while I make him a cappuccino. Or a nonfat, decaf mocha with no whipped cream. You know what I'm saying.

And I won't hesitate to give a shout out to those baristas that take a certain sense of pride in pulling the perfect shot or steaming their milk to just the right consistency.

And maybe the girls at these places take the same pride in their work. But do their customers appreciate that? Or do they appreciate ... something else?

But maybe I'm comparing apples and oranges here.



Props to Jacob at Smelling the Coffee for the link.

(Photo credit: Mike Siegel/The Seattle Times)

Sunday school teacher fired because she has a vagina

Baptist preacher Tim LeBouf fired 81-year-old Mary Lambert, who has taught Sunday School for more than 50 years. Why? Did she show up to work late? Did she exhibit improper conduct in the classroom?

Oh, no. She was fired because she was a woman, and apparently some obscure reference in the Bible says that women shouldn't teach men or some stupid shit like that:

"My belief is that the qualifications for both men and women teaching spiritual matters in a church setting end at the church door, period," LaBouf said in a statement on the church Web site (http://www.nnyinfo.com/firstbaptist).

LaBouf and the church board fired Mary Lambert, 81, earlier this month in a letter that cited the scriptural qualifications for Sunday School teachers, Lambert said.

"They quote First Timothy Two, 11-14: A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, she must be silent," Lambert said, reading from the letter.

Please. Seriously. I simply cannot understand how people can base their lives and their actions on a literal interpretation of the Bible - a book written by men, and not (if you believe) in God himself. How can you expect any text to remain intact over centuries, when even the messages going out in contemporary media are completely out of control?

And honestly, the subjugation of women in relation to men is a notion that has absolutely no place in modern society, and I don't care what faith you are (or aren't).

My good friend Jonsey is blogging again, and his post on this subject caught my eye. Go to his post and read his take on this issue --- he is one of the most intelligent, thoughtful writers in the blogosphere I've read in a while, and he approaches politics and social issues from another, very interesting angle.

(Cross-posted on BIO.)

Women of South Dakota, reclaim your uteri

So they've signed that bill into law in South Dakota which makes it a crime for doctors to perform an abortion - unless the woman's health is at stake (thank Jah for small favors). Instances of rape or incest are not included in this exemption.

Also, apparently a committee voted down a measure in that bill to immediately terminate all parental rights of a rapist upon conviction.

I'm with Kvatch. If you're a woman living in South Dakota, get the hell outta Dodge.

Reject this legalized and institutionalized misogyny. Because even if you get raped in that state and become pregnant, there's a chance that your rapist will continue to be in your life, at least until the child turns 18. And hey, maybe he'll try to rape you again. And again. Or maybe it'll be some other rapist. And then maybe you'll have given birth enough times to have a nice little family. And well, gosh darn it, isn't that just great! Family values rule! (Just don't ever talk about the fact that Daddy's a rapist.)

I don't even know what else to say about this, except to leave you with this one frightening quote from Nancy Keenan, president of NARAL Pro-Choice America:

Some other states are considering similar bans on abortion, and the South Dakota legislation will have an impact in other states.

I wouldn't be surprised if other states do, in fact, jump on the Sadists in South Dakota bandwagon. How the hell does a country like ours manage to throw away years and years of progress in such a relatively short period of time?

Totally disgusting.

You may also want to check out Blogenlust's take on this issue, as if you weren't riled up enough already.

The Sadists in South Dakota

South Dakota's Senate State Affairs Committee, as we all know, passed legislation in their state this week to ban all abortions. All of them. Even if it meant that having the baby would kill the mother or cause serious long-term damage to her body.

And I thought, wow, that's really stupid and unfortunate, but thank Jah I live in California where it is still legal (for now). And I read the responses on all of my favorite blogs. And I have to say, I was complacent. That shit would never fly in California, I thought.

And not like I think I'd ever have an abortion if I were ever to get pregnant. And of course I say that now, but you never really know until you're in that situation.

But then.

My friend Erica at Soft Pretzel Love put in her two cents. In the middle of her post, she shows this photo of a woman, Gerri Santoro, naked, lying on the floor face down, legs spread, knees bent. She's clutching a towel in her right hand, an attempt to try and stop the bleeding from her botched "back alley" abortion done by the baby daddy who happened to have his hands on some medical instruments and a medical book he borrowed from a colleague. Abortion, DIY style.

Here's the link to Erica's post. But I have to warn you, the picture - if you haven't seen it before - is graphic. Gerri Santoro is there. All up in your face.

Looking at the photo turned my stomach, obviously. The image is haunting. And I wanted to cry, because she didn't have to die like that. But she did, because where she was from, abortion was illegal. It was 1964.

Immediately I thought of all of my close friends and family who have had abortions, and I thought, "what if this happened to them?"

I wonder if these fool lawmakers in South Dakota ever try to think that way. My guess is they'd blame the woman for having sex. Hell, they'd probably blame her because she left the house, instead of staying home and cooking. Or if it was one of their daughters, they'd whisk her off to their high-priced private doctor, do the D&C, and then nobody in the family would be allowed to ever mention it. Especially at the dinner table.

What is it about the pro-life debate that says the one life is more important than another? Why, in the proselytizing over morals and "family values," does this preclude the individual autonomy of a woman to make her own decisions when it comes to her own body?

Part of me wishes I'd never seen Gerri Santoro's crime scene photo. But then again, it's a good thing I did, because now I will never forget her.

Might as well hand over your uterus now

So the muthafreakin' bastards in the Senate confirmed Alito 58-42. And apparently there are some senators who voted for cloture but voted against Alito's confirmation. Compare the votes here. Slippery political maneuvering, I see. Dave at Seeing the Forest shares this same opinion: How the hell an you vote against the filibuster, then vote against the nomination? Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Dubya's State of the Union address is on tonight. I'll probably watch, because I'm nursing a bad back and will have nothing else to do. If I weren't on Vitamin V right now, I'd totally turn it into a drinking game: Every time Dubya mentions "9/11," take a shot/drink of your choice. Catherine at Povertybarn comes up with another one:

Every time Georgie says "freedom" in his sad State he has made of this Union Speech tonight, you must take a shot of something gross because let's face it he leaves a sour taste in all our mouths and hearts.

By the end of the address, you'll feel about as fucked up as this country is going to be. Or already is. Dubya may as well show up on stage with another "Mission Accomplished" banner hanging in the background.

What's Your Plan B?

Dr. W. David Hager, an evangelical doctor who prescribes prayer for PMS, may have had undue influence over the Food and Drug Administration's decision on over-the-counter status for the emergency contraceptive Plan B.

Religious fanatics who blatantly disregard their hippocratic oath in the name of their own personal faith shouldn't be deemed worthy of the title of "doctor." And this guy is a GYNECOLOGIST! This guy is supposed to be some kind of authority on women's health issues??? What a crock of shit.

A recent article in The Nation reveals some insight into his marriage to Linda Hager (now Davis), which was not exactly "holy" in and of itself. This guy is one crazy mysogynistic fucker.

"Even though I was trained as a medical specialist," Hager explained in the preface to As Jesus Cared for Women, "it wasn't until I began to see how Jesus treated women that I understood how I, as a doctor, should treat them." To underscore this revelation, Hager recounted case after case in which he acted as confidant, spiritual adviser and even father figure to his grateful patients. As laid out in his writings, Hager's worldview is not informed by a sense of inherent equality between men and women. Instead, men are expected to act as benevolent authority figures for the women in their lives.

Check out this snippet of marital bliss:

Sometimes Hager would blithely shift from vaginal to anal sex. Davis protested. "He would say, 'Oh, I didn't mean to have anal sex with you; I can't feel the difference,'" Davis recalls incredulously. "And I would say, 'Well then, you're in the wrong business.'"

This is yet another example in the long, exhaustive list of examples, of the kinds of scumbuckets the Bush Administration consorts with in matters of public policy. This needs to stop. The Feminist Majority is encouraging concerned folks to bombard the FDA mailboxes with letters of outrage at their delay in giving over-the-counter status to Plan B. Do your part here.