Art Imitating Life

Didn't I just watch this on "House" last night?

I must be ovulating ...

... or really hungry, because this is sounding pretty good right now. I don’t even care if it can’t make chocolate:

On the machine's front is a computer screen running on a Linux operating system. It displays menus of possible flavors and allows the user to create any combination, such as low-fat coffee ice cream with Oreo cookies. If the machine runs out of a flavor, it stops putting it on the menu and sends a message to MooBella asking for a refill.

So far, so good, until:

[MooBella President Bruce] Ginsberg raises the idea that Starbucks could fit a MooBella machine in most of its shops. “We could make Starbucks the largest ice cream chain overnight,” he says.

How's it taste? USA TODAY's Edward Baig wrote: “My sample scoop of low-carb vanilla with cookies 'n' cream was tasty.” Fortune's Peter Lewis wrote: “The machine delivers a freshly made scoop that, based on my exhaustive testing, tastes delicious despite a slight gumminess.”

But then again ... ice cream via vending machine at an SBUX seems somewhat fitting.

Ciao, Scotty

From the AP:

"I thought he handled his assignment with class, integrity," the president said. "It's going to be hard to replace Scott, but nevertheless he made the decision and I accepted it. One of these days, he and I are going to be rocking in chairs in Texas and talking about the good old days."

My reaction? Meh. Although it was fun to call him "Scott 'I hate my job' McClellan," I really won't be happy until Bush and Cheney are outta here.

Also, Doughboy is giving up his oversight of policy coordination in order to "focus more on politics with the approach of the midterm elections."

Yawn. See what I mean? More of the same.

Me and my brilliant ideas

As part of my efforts to get in better shape, I rode my bike to work today. It's about two miles each way, which isn't so bad, except why the HELL did I have to pick an apartment at the top of a hill?

Let's just say that I'm not good at negotiating the inclines as of yet. And don't even tell me to stand up on the bike. See that sweaty girl panting heavily and walking her bike up the hill? That's me, looking silly as all hell.

And seriously, these bike helmets? Not cute.

Thankfully, the area in which I live is bike friendly, although one driver did honk his/her horn at me on the way home today. Maybe he/she was mocking me and my badonkadonk; maybe he/she was signaling to me that he/she was there; or maybe he/she was flirting with me (this is Oakland, after all). All I have to say was that I was too tired to muster a reaction, which I guess is a good thing.

Thank Jah, I managed to get home safely, and now my right arm is twitching (wtf?). The experience was both frightening and exhilarating - kind of like how I felt the first (and only) time I went skiing. I've put off riding my bike to work before because a) my old neighborhood was also situated on a hill, b) I wasn't motivated, and c) I'm deathly afraid of riding my bike in the street.

But for some reason, today I was just UNafraid enough to give it a shot. We'll see how I feel the same way tomorrow morning, but I have to admit, I'm feeling quite accomplished today. Yay me.

The Starbucks Effect?

If it’s not love, then it’s Starbucks that will bring us together (sorry, Morrissey). At least that’s what Bryant Simon and Jonathan Morris, British historians, seems to think.

According to Morris, coffee culture unites us while enabling us to continue to self-isolate:

Starbucks and other coffee houses, he believes, fill "some kind of deep desire for connection with other people."

But unlike the coffee houses of 18th century London or the bohemian java dens of 1950s New York, "Starbucks makes sure you can be alone when you're out if you really need to be," he said. "You get the feeling you're out in public, but you don't need to talk to anyone."

Simon’s conducting a study of the globalization of 21st-century coffee culture, and has visited more than 300 SBUX locations throughout the world. Through his observations, he believes that SBUX provides a glimpse into “what it means to live and consume in the age of globalization.”

Can it be that the popularity of SBUX transcends the quality of the coffee that they sell?

Simon believes Starbucks succeeds by "selling comfort" in an anonymous, often dislocating world. He says he has lost track of the number of times people have told him that when they traveled to a strange country, "the first thing I did when I got off the plane was go to Starbucks."

"There's a deep sense of unpredictability in the modern world, and what Starbucks provides a lot of people is predictability," he said.

And with predictability comes more marketability, and with more marketability comes the inevitable entry into pop culture.

Starbucks's chairman, Howard Schultz, told shareholders at their annual meeting Feb. 8 that the company is focusing on "the Starbucks effect" — that is, putting a bigger emphasis on music sales, movie marketing and other non-coffee products.

From a corporate perspective, does the “academia effect” mean that you’ve “arrived” as a company?

In terms of their study, I think it’d be better if these historians looked at café culture as a whole, rather than focus on one brand. But then again, I can see that they probably want to limit to one brand, precisely because it is so pervasive.

And what does this say about our society as a whole if one of the places by which we derive a sense of community from is a huge coffee chain? And what does it say about our society that this one brand has become so inextricably a part of our lives? (Well, for some of us, anyway.) This brand is even the subject of an upcoming movie starring Tom Hanks, for Jah's sake.

It’s certainly easier to focus on SBUX because they’re everywhere – but how about focusing on selling a quality product rather than getting a larger share of my wallet?

Sunday Evening Walrus Work Out Blogging

No, seriously. This walrus will get a six-pack before I do.

Pants on Fire

So you see, there were these two trailers in Baghdad in 2003 that Bush said was proof that they found the WMDs, right?

According to the Washington Post, it turns out that a fact-finding mission determined that these trailers weren't the biological warfare labs Bush had thought they were. Oops.

A secret fact-finding mission to Iraq -- not made public until now -- had already concluded that the trailers had nothing to do with biological weapons. Leaders of the Pentagon-sponsored mission transmitted their unanimous findings to Washington in a field report on May 27, 2003, two days before the president's statement.

The three-page field report and a 122-page final report three weeks later were stamped "secret" and shelved. Meanwhile, for nearly a year, administration and intelligence officials continued to publicly assert that the trailers were weapons factories.

This hadn't been reported until now - almost a full three years later, and well, Scotty "I hate my job" McClellan was forced, yet again, to shovel more bullshit for the Bush administration today:

Q: So, insofar as in May there was a 122-page report filed by DIA that said that these trailers were not bio-weapons, but it was -- or bio-weapons labs, and then we heard from the Vice President and Colin Powell after that period suggesting that they still were -- that information hadn't --

MR. McCLELLAN: First of all, intelligence is -- when an assessment is made, it looks at a lot of different intelligence and it takes time to vet that intelligence, go through it, debate it, discuss it with the intelligence community, look at all the different intelligence coming in, whether it's human intelligence or signals intelligence or open-source intelligence. And they pull that all together and the intelligence community makes the assessment. The White House is not the intelligence-gathering agency. And the assessment that the CIA and the Defense Intelligence Agency, which is the arm of the Pentagon, made initially was that those -- in this report that was released on May 28, 2003, was that the labs that were found were for producing biological weapons. And that assessment remained in place for quite some time, as you just pointed out.

Now, I will point out that the reporting I saw this morning was simply reckless and it was irresponsible. The lead in The Washington Post left the impression for the reader that the President was saying something he knew at the time not to be true. That is absolutely false and it is irresponsible, and I don't know how The Washington Post can defend something so irresponsible.

Bush made an announcement two days after this report came out saying the contrary. There were no WMDs in those trailers, and yet the administration sat on this information - stamped it "secret" and shelved it away for THREE YEARS, while continuing to feed the post-9/11 hordes of fear-addled Americans this lie that Saddam faced an imminent threat to the US.

Another example of manipulating intelligence? Oh no. It's just the media being shit disturbers again.

Earth to the Bush Administration: That's what they're supposed to be doing.

(Thanks to BYO for the heads up.)

Are you down with the Brown?

You have GOT to be kidding me.

More on Nuking Iran

Check out Meteor Blades' post on The Next Hurrah about the implications involved if the U.S. were to use nuclear power to bomb Iran. And even if the post title is "BBC Calls Nuking of Iran 'Improbable'," I'm still not convinced it won't happen.

It's like I'm in 5th grade again, freaking out over "The Day After." Only this time - as proven by Bush's stubbornness in going to war with Iraq - the threat seems all too real. And my feelings of fear and uncertainty stem from the fact that Bush feels like this is his calling, to invoke regime change after regime change, all in the name of spreading Democracy around the world.

And even though the BBC lays out logical bullet points explaining why this notion is improbable, once Bush believes that his decision is the right decision, he won't waver - as we all know, he views this stubbornness as an honorable personality trait.

I just cannot understand how Bush can reconcile his intentions with the undoubted effects of nuclear weapons on human lives, the environment, the planet itself - all in the name of unbridled nationalism, and, as James Fallows of The Atlantic Monthly says, "the triumph of hope, wishful thinking, and self-delusion over realism and practicality."

And how can some people, namely, Bush's partisan disciples - as human beings - support this?

BlaKsploitation

For those of you who aren't in the know, Coke came out with a new "carbonated fusion beverage," called Coca Cola BlaK.

I have a bottle of it sitting on my desk, and I'm afraid to taste it. How can this taste good?

Think Coke plus coffee flavor, that froths when you pour it. I'm sure it does NOT equal "crazy delicious."

The website cracks me up with its two music tracks: One jazzed-out smooth, and one pseudo drum-n-bass.

The better to inspire your mind and refresh your mood, yo.

New meme

Courtesy of the Carpetbagger Report:

Cheney needs to hold a press conference.

Pass it on.

It's a boy

Mortimer is dead.

Long live Moses.


(Thanks to Atrios for the heads up.)

Leaker In Chief

From Reuters:

Bush said he declassified parts of the document to answer questions raised about why the United States invaded Iraq.

"I wanted people to see what some of those statements were based on. I wanted people to see the truth. I thought it made sense for people to see the truth. That's why I declassified the document," he said.

I'm with Avedon Carol on this one. Why not just issue a press release? Or hold a press conference? For an administration as PR-savvy as this one (think Doughboy and his "architecture"), why the clandestine behavior?

Nice attempt at spin, guys.

And don't even get me started on Iran. Words fail me at the moment.

Inside the Blogger's Studio

Or, alternatively, "Friday Afternoon James Lipton Blogging":

1. What is your favorite word? - "Mediocre." (It's just the perfect word for what it's describing.)
2. 
   What is your least favorite word? - "Inspired." (Long story.)
3. 
   What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? - Passion.
4. 
   What turns you off? - Ignorance.
5. 
   What is your favorite curse word? - Fuck!
6. 
   What sound or noise do you love? - Being told I'm beautiful, softly whispered in my ear.
7. 
   What sound or noise do you hate? - Sorostitute-speak.
8. 
   What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? - Reggae DJ.
9. 
   What profession would you not like to do? - Dairy farmer.
10. 
    If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? - "You were right all along - that WASN'T what I meant!"

(Inspiration shamelessly lifted from Kvatch.)

The blog o' love

I must be one sappy mofo, because this tickled me:

Nim proposed to Jen on Eschaton today, and she said yes. But not until after she finished her online Scrabble game.

No word yet on whether there will be live podcasting of the bachlor/ette parties.

What-eva, I’ll do what I want!

True to form, Bush is trying to change the rules in the middle of the game, now saying that the Plame leak wasn’t a “leak,” per se:

The White House refused to comment directly on the court filing, except to point out that Bush's very decision to disclose classified information means he declassified it -- an assessment shared by independent legal experts.

A senior administration official, speaking on background because White House policy prohibits comment on an active investigation, said Bush sees a distinction between leaks and what he is alleged to have done. The official said Bush authorized the release of the classified information to assure the public of his rationale for war as it was coming under increasing scrutiny.

In other words, “It wasn’t a leak, because I declassified the information before I leaked it.” Sounds like an indirect admission that he authorized the leak to me. Changing the classification of a document before disclosing it was a purely tactical move which, according to Nancy Pelosi, was a highly egregious error – not only for Valerie Plame – but for the entire country:

“I served for 13 years on the House intelligence committee, and I know intelligence must never be classified or declassified for political purposes,” said House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.). “One of the constants in the Bush administration's miserable record on Iraq has been the manipulation of intelligence precisely for political purposes. That has caused our intelligence—which used to be accepted without question around the world—to be viewed with skepticism by the international community.”

Is the beating of the Impeachment Drum getting louder yet? I hear it off in the distance, but I'm hoping the sound will be deafening. And soon.

(Thanks to TPM for the heads up. Cross-posted at Bring It On!)

Merideth Viera: You go, girl

So I watch NBC's Today show while getting ready for work and quickly consuming my [insert toasted bread product here] slathered with butter/glass of water/multivitamin/Claritin every morning. A part of me is somewhat sad to see Katie Couric go - I guess I got a little attached to the Couric/Lauer duo. Don't judge me. I still can't stand Al Roker. And I had a slight girly crush on Ann Curry until she got that stupid bob haircut.

But I digress.

So Merideth Viera from "The View," aka "That Coffee Klatch I Can't Stand to Watch" is going to take her place.

Me: "Whatevs." (Scandal fatigue and writer's block aside, mind you.)

Until I saw this Viera quote from Will Bunch's Attytood:

Check out her handling of Ann Coulter on "The View" in 2003:

Viera: "In your last book you said liberals have been wrong about everything in last half century. You ticked us off over that one, alright. And now in this new book you say that liberals hate freedom...I want to talk about your politics because in Treason you say, yes, that liberals hate America."

Ann Coulter: "Right."

Vieira: "Well, it's stupid. What do you mean liberals hate America?"

Proper.




Let's hope she doesn't check her balls at the door of NBC, eh?

Bring on the swift, sweet justice. STAT.

In light of Scooter's revelation that he got explicit approval to talk to the press revealing Valerie Plame's identity, the time for increased pressure on Bush and Cheney to 'fess up is NOW.

Fitzgerald quoted Libby as saying he was authorized to tell New York Times reporter Judith Miller that Iraq was "vigorously trying to procure" uranium. Fitzgerald said Libby told him it "was the only time he recalled in his government experience when he disclosed a document to a reporter that was effectively declassified by virtue of the president's authorization that it be disclosed."

The process was so secretive that other Cabinet-level officials did not know about it, according to the court papers, which point to Bush and Cheney as setting in motion a leak campaign to the press that ended in Plame's blown cover.

We've been lied to. People are dying for a lie. What else needs to happen for these two crooks to get impeached? Or censured ... at the very least? C'mon now. Let's keep it real.

Waiting to Exhale

I have scandal fatigue.

And writer's block.

Bear with me.

In the meantime, did you know that this year they're celebrating the 50th anniversary of Jarlsberg cheese?

I didn't either.

Boort's Non-Apology

So that right-wing talk radio show host that I've never heard of "apologized" for calling McKinney a "ghetto slut." Although, it only sounds like 25% apology and 75% snark to me:

Actually, I should be horsewhipped for saying something stupid that allowed, to some extent, the attention to shift from the wrongdoing of Cynthia McKinney to my ill-chosen words. The issue here is not how one would define Cynthia McKinney's hairstyle. The issue is whether or not Cynthia McKinney assaulted a law enforcement officer who was merely trying to do his sworn duty. Contrast, if you would, my apology with that of Cynthia McKinney. McKinney has only said that she "regrets" that the incident happened. That is not an apology. So far as I've heard there has not been one "I'm sorry." Instead, McKinney stages a news conference Friday afternoon featuring two of premiere Hollywood leftist jackasses, Danny Glover and Harry Belafonte, two men fresh from their recent appearance giving aid and comfort to America-hater Hugo Chavez in Venezuela. So, there is Cynthia McKinney, standing there with two men who have said some mighty foul things about our country and our president, accusing a police officer of being a racist because he didn't recognize her when she circumvented a screening station. That man spends his days protecting McKinney and her colleagues; and she thanks him by calling him a racist for merely doing his job. Let's see if Cynthia can eventually stand up and apologize for being a fool. I just did. It really doesn't hurt all that much.

I'm glad he addressed the stupidity of his comments, but I am really disappointed because really, it's only a half-hearted apology. He had to bring race into it (AND call her a slut). And if he really wants McKinney to be held accountable for her actions, he should have never, ever brought up her hair. I don't care how well he knows her personally - racism is still alive and well in this country, and by his comments, he's taken us a step in the wrong direction.

(Thanks to Pam at Pandagon for the heads up.)